We Were Both Young When I First Saw You

My mind is racing, my heart is pounding. It's true what they say about long distance relationships, how they're crazy and stupid, and psychotic, and frankly just plain hard. The truth of the matter is I love her with all my heart she means so very much to me. To be honest though, I'm afraid I might lose her and the rational side of me is screaming at the top of its little voice "Let. The. Fraction. Go!" (my rational side likes math humor) But we all know deep down inside I'm not only an optimist but a hopeless romantic (a pain in the butt combination, trust me.) so my heart is screaming at me in an even louder voice.

HOLD ON IDIOT!!!!!!!


(my heart prefers to get straight to the point.) 


And honestly I'm probably gonna listen to my heart, because that's what I do I always ignore my head and listen to my heart, and I usually end up regretting it. But, I don't know for the first time in my life I've truly found someone worth fighting for, and I may be scrawny, and weak, but right now at least I'm gonna fight tooth and nail because that's what I do. I'm tired of being the boy who's too nice to date I'm tired of pining  after someone for ages only to see them go out with someone when I finally get up the courage to tell them how I feel.


So no moar. 


I've always been able to give great advice on relationships, I've always dreamed of all the things I would do for a girl, and whether because she didn't like me or we both made mistakes or were just to nerdy and nervous to do what needed to be done. I've never really been able to do those things. Now I finally have a relationship where I can and have done them, and it turns out that I like doing them! (I know duh! Right?) Point is I want to keep doing them forever.

I know some of you will read this and not understand, some of you will read it and sympathize or not I don't care. SUFFICE it to say I am happy to be here with her, and I am happy with her, the long distance thing has just killed us. But I plan on continuing to be happy with her, and who knows maybe I'm completely wrong and I'm just running down a hill that ends in heart break, but Damnit Jim! I'm a hopeless romantic not logical. (I have a dirty secret: I've been waiting forever to work in a Star Trek reference into my blog.)  I can't just stopping being an optimistic, hopeless romantic, it's who I am and has defined pretty much every choice I've ever made in life.

So this is the new me, my new years resolutions, it's like in the old movies a guy see's a girl across a crowded room and he turns to his friend and say "I'm gonna marry that girl one day." Well this is me saying it, nay this is me screaming it, I'm in love with Laura Fae Sgro, and I sure as Hell am not gonna go down without a fight.

P.S. I'm sorry about the rational joke too. What can I say? Math humor makes me chuckle.

P.P.S. I noticed in retrospect that this seems kind of mopey but it isn't supposed to be. It's supposed to be kind of determined, or resolute?

P.P.P.S. Resolute is a great word I don't use it often enough. And if you're having trouble reading as such, hum Eye of The Tiger or some similar, motivational-y song, it helps.