A Chip Off The Old Block

Oh hai everybody! Remember me? That blogger you started following who never writes? I know, I know you're think "What a douche" right? Well fear not dear readers, I believe, (assuming you like my proposition of course) That I have come up with something clever and witty to keep up rather regular posts! (Insert fanfare here) So without further ado I give you what I've tentatively decided to call "A Chip off The Old Block"

Day 1

I awoke this morning in a strange land with no idea where I was or how I had managed to get there. All around me where oak trees and above all an oppressive silence save the occasional moo of some cow off in the distance.

Seeing no immediate signs of civilization I decided to explore the general area in the hopes of finding some farm or village where I might inquire as to my location. However by mid afternoon I was forced to concluded that my search was in vain. Having thus returned to the clearing in which I had first awoken I endeavored to find some cave or hole in which I might pass the night. However once again my search was in vain. Having spent most of my day aimlessly wandering around I admit I gave into a rather childish display of rage and began punching a tree. To my delight I discovered that after several blows I was actually able to break the tree and collect some wood.

Having made this wonderful discovery I immediately set about collecting as much wood as possible as the day was fast getting on and I must admit I felt rather uneasy for some unexplained reason about spending the night out in the open.

As the sun began to set I had myself a rather quaint little hut of wood and resolved to wait out the night till dawn. When all of sudden I heard the most ghastly moans outside of my walls. Not wanting to be caught unprepared I set about creating a table on which to craft items and made myself a simple weapon out of wood.

I fear I will not survive this night, I pray to Notch that I may make it through and avoid whatever horrors continue to moan and rattle outside my door!

Improbably Impossible

Well hello there!

     It's been awhile, and so very much has happened since my lost post so I figured it was time to give an update. First off my humble little blog has recently hit 1,500 views! I want to thank all of you who have helped me reach this goal. It means a lot to me that so many of you take time out of your day to read my tiny section of the internet. It's funny you know, my blogs second birthday is just around the corner too and even after two years I still have no idea where I'm headed with this blog.

     I've often been asked why I don't delete posts about things that no longer hold true in my life, such as past relationships. I personally think that's silly though, even though they didn't work out like I expected those relationships are what have made me who I am and gotten me to this point in my life, and I  believe that's something that should be remembered rather than hidden.

      Moving on, as many of you know my life hasn't gone exactly according to plan over the past few months and even though I'm still not out of the woods yet I'm striving to set things right and bring myself back up. I've been depressed as of late, but I started talking with a therapist recently and I think I'm making headway to being a happier person again.

    Finally, I've several letters I'd like to get out there for those that need to read them to read if they will, and if they don't; I suppose that's their loss isn't it?

Letter #1
Hey,


     I'm honestly truly sorry, I know I haven't exactly lived up to your expectations and though we no longer talk just know that I am trying. It's been hard harder than I ever imagined, but I am trying. I hope one day we can look back on this together and see that this is a turning point toward being what we know I can be, and achieving the goals I know I can. That's all I can say to you right now I wish I had more but I don't, so I hope this suffices for now.


Love,
Sam


Letter #2
My Dear,


     It's been far too long. I've not a lot that I can say to you but know this much: I regret the way I acted all things considered I lost a truly wonderful friend when I drove you away and I hope that one day perhaps you and I can talk again. I miss our delightfully heated debates over silly things. It was always such a pleasure to talk to you and I look forward to a time when you and I can be friends again.


Sam


Letter #3
Hello Sweetie,


     I've so much I wish I could say to you but I know I'll never get the chance. Oh sweetie. 


Sam


Letter #4
Oh My Darling,


     It's been so very long since I've written to you. I've so much to say to you but I've no idea where to begin. I'm rather confused about the whole situation to be perfectly honest. I love that we're talking again believe me. You've helped me so much recently and I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't been there to talk to me and support me. Just... please don't go anywhere and... well I don't know why right now but I pray you stick around as a friend. 


Yours Truly,
Sam


Letter #5
Hey,


     I know you probably won't read this; you've made it abundantly clear you don't care for blogs nor understand their purpose. But anyway I just wanted to say I'm sorry, and I will make it up to you. I know that my word doesn't mean a lot right now but it's all I have and whatever it takes I will make this right I promise.


Sam


Letter #6
Hello,


     Unlike all the other people to who I am writing I'm almost completely sure you aren't going to read this. However if for some reason you do I just wanted to thank you for something you did today. It may be silly and not seem like a lot but it meant so very much to me. You smiled and waved at me. You've been a great friend through out all of this and though I didn't really realize it at the time. So thank you, I can't even explain what that simple act of kindness did for me today.


Sincerely,
Sam

Out of The Blue

Hey you,

It's been awhile. I just wanted to write you and let you know I'm doing better. Not great, but better and that's a start I suppose. I won't say I'm happy without you because that's a lie, but I'm beginning to see that maybe it's better this way. I don't know for sure but I think it might be. At the end of the day all I wanted was for you to be happy with or without me I don't care, but happy nonetheless.

I miss you of course that goes without saying, you meant the world to me and that isn't something that's just going to go away. There will always be that part of me that hangs on. The little voice that screams at me for trying to let go. But to Hell with that voice. I know you no longer care for me as you used to and though I won't pretend to understand how the feelings you had for me can just disappear as they did, I'm not going to try and force you to have them again.

I loved you my dear.

Time for me to buck up though. It's silly to let you control, my life as you have till now. So I'm moving on. I hope one day you and I can be friends again but if not that's okay too. Truth be told I know from experience were we to talk again those feelings would come back. And they'd be awfully hard to hold back. If we ever talk again I'll let you know if that's a good or bad thing. Anyway I should think it's time for our goodbyes my love, it's better this way in a sense. I truly do hope you have a happy life. I know you'll accomplish so much with it.

Goodbye.

An Oxford Comma

It's been awhile I know, I've never been very good at these things I always forget they exist I'm afraid. And I hate to admit this but this one is also going to be rather short. A lot has gone on in my life over the past few months but I'll spare you the details. I feel I should make it clear that this post will serve a number of purposes,  it will be an update, a Tuesday letter, and a promise, one I will hopefully be able to keep.

As far as the promise is concerned I shall make it now: I won't promise to write here more often but I will certainly try. What I will promise is this: as I've mentioned before I do consider myself a bit of an amateur writer; and so I have decided, given recent events to take up a task I've have flirted around for years, I'm going to write my book. I will of course attempt to keep you updated, and perhaps from time to time even post snippets of it as I finish them but as I said I can make no promise of doing it regularly. So, wish me luck dear readers on this endeavor and we'll see just where I end up with it.

Now we've covered the update, and the promise, so I guess all that's left is the letter. It's simple, and short, and holds so very, very, true:

I miss you. 

So There's This Girl...

     That's right ladies and gentlemen the perpetual hopeless romantic has a girlfriend. (crazy, I know.) But anyway; I realize that I am long, long, long long, long over due for a post and I figured that now would be as good a time as any to give you the low down on this pretty awesome girl.

     I'd like to be all clever and open this post with some cliched thing about waking up like any other day only this time I'm waking up next to her but I'm afraid that's already been taken. So here's how I'll start this ramble:

Every so often when I'm talking to her or, looking at her she gives me this look. I wish I could explain it so you could understand but I can't, suffice it to say it always starts me wondering, what is she thinking? And I confess there are a great many times I'd love to know what's going through her mind. She's such an enigma to me at times and it drives me crazy. I know she doesn't do it on purpose. She's been hurt a lot in the past this wonderful, amazing girl. ( which whole other topic but in short to all the douche bags who hurt her/ let her go: you're idiots, but I'm glad you are cause I got her because of your stupidity. [oh and additional side note: you're all jack asses, so there's that. Sorry in advance if I punch if ever presented with the opportunity.) She's getting better as each day progresses. Sometimes though I think she doesn't realize just how hurt I've been too. She always says she's the lucky one because she got me and I'm helping her become unbroken, but what she doesn't always seem to realize is I'm just as lucky because she's been helping me too.

     There are people who condemn us for our relationship, for whatever reason, and to those people all I can say is sorry, but I'm happy with her. And though it may seem like our relationship is moving fast, I'd have to be inclined to disagree with you. No two people are ever the same, and so it stands to reason that no two relationships are either, and in the belief just know that I am happy with her, I'm happy where she and are at and I'm happy about the time at which we arrived at this place. I know some won't ever understand this but I feel like it needs saying.

     To continue: This girl. She's funny, she's smart, she's pretty, she's a leader. She's far stronger then she realizes and I can't wait for the day she discovers it. And though she has many fears about how our relationship is going to turn out I plan on sticking around and silencing each and every one of them. Robert Frost famously said that we should take the road less traveled, and while I agree with the sentiment the road less traveled still has a map and in this case I think I'll blaze a new road come what may. And I can't wait to see what new wonders she and I find upon it as we make our way.

Tuesday Letters: This One's Long

I mean really long, so, you know, bare with me.

I don't know why but it seems like whenever I'm in a pinch I write to you. Perhaps because it's easy, or simply because we've been through a lot emotionally. You're a wonderful friend there's no doubt about that. I enjoy talking to you we always seem to have such witty conversations. (sarcasm will do that for you.) 


There's so much I'd simply love to say to you. Unfortunately I never seem to know what they are when I actually have the chance. 


I know... how to properly phrase this? Okay. I like you, I've no doubt you know that, and I know we're only friends and believe me I am okay with that. Especially considering all I've been through lately in the relationship department. I told you I would be whatever you needed me to be and as such I am perfectly happy to be your friend. But I have to be honest (cue hopeless romanticism) I won't say I will always have these feelings because forever is a very long time. But I will say that I'll have them for a while. I guess basically I'm currently apologizing for any likely future/current awkwardness.


And on that subject...... I would of course love to go out with you, because, you know, I like you and all. I think, perhaps we might be good together, but like I said I understand that you don't want that and I'm okay with that. I guess it's just important to me for you to know the whole truth. Although I suppose writing an open letter does kind of defeat that purpose but I suppose you get the point anyway. 


I don't know where I'm going with this. Perhaps just rambling on like I always do. I'm lost about all this, I don't really know why but I just am. It's not a bad thing it's just what it is right now. I'd love to do exactly what you'd like me to do. And if all that is me being your friend, then damn it! I'm gonna be the best friend I can be.


Because I can. 


(I did edit this, I ranted for a while longer but it kind of made very little sense when I went back and read it, but I digress.) 


Your's Truly,


Sam


P.S. I still posted before midnight on Tuesday, yay!


P.P.S. It really isn't your fault by the way, I am awfully sorry about everything that's happened. I just wanted you to know that. 


P.P.P.S. This is about you, but I'm fairly certain you guessed that this time, but perhaps not who knows? 

Hey Didn't See You There!

     I started this post as another open letter. In all honesty I start most of them as open letters because I actually really enjoy writing letters even if I never send them. There's just something relaxing about expressing all the thoughts and feelings that tend to get jumbled up in one simple concise place. Anyway as I read this big long rant of a letter in which I rambled mostly to fill space most likely, I realized I could boil it down to a few sentences so I thought it would be cool for my weekly post to write something of a mix between Jimmy Fallon's Thank You Notes and the open letters. So, each Tuesday I will write one of these open letter thank you thingys  at least until I come up with a better thing to post weekly haha. 

     So here is my first Tuesday Letter:

Hey, you. 

     It's been a while, I could (and have) written you a long letter but I'm going to condense it to the important stuff. I'm worried about you, and I just want you to know I'm thinking about you and here if you need me. That's it, I hope things get better.

Oh! And because I feel like giving an extra one, mostly because I can't pass up this perfect opportunity here's one more on a lighter note. 

How's it going in there? I appreciate you being quite. It has been a while though so trust me.... We ALL KNOW what's going on. I just wanted to let you know I took the liberty of lending your door knob a sock, just in case could you please make sure it gets washed before you give it back.

Love,

Your Thoughtful Roomy